Me: Hey, Jak, thanks for meeting with me today.
Jak: …
Me: So… do you
mind if I just dive right in?
Jak: …
Me: What do you
consider your greatest achievement?
Jak: Keeping
Maurelle alive.
Me: That’s been
a challenge?
Jak: No, keeping
a wanted fugitive hidden and alive in a strange city during a financial
depression is a cakewalk.
Me: No need to
be sarcastic.
Jak: *snorts*
Me: What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Jak: Safety. And plenty to eat.
Me: Have those things been difficult to attain?
Jak: “Wanted fugitive,” “financial depression.”
Me: *reading from interview questions* “What is your current state of
mind?” I can answer that one: Snarky.
Jak: *smirks*
Me: What is your current occupation?
Jak: Enforcer.
Me: Do you like the work?
Jak: No.
Me: What would you like to do instead?
Jak: *shrugs*
Me: If you could have any job you wanted.
Jak: Gee, I think I’d drive an ice cream truck.
Me: Are you going to be this sarcastic the whole time?
Jak: Yes.
Me: *purses lips* What are your hobbies?
Jak: Weaponry. Fighting.
Me: What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Jak: My .45. *draws the gun and twirls it around his finger*
Me: What do you
think is your most marked characteristic?
Jak: My sunny
disposition.
Me: I’m going to
smack you.
Jak: *smirks*
Me: When and
where were you happiest?
Jak: When I was
a child. Back in Fairyland.
Me: Are you
happy in New York?
Jak: *shrugs*
Me: What is it
that you most dislike?
Jak: The
Council. Though ‘dislike’ is a mild term.
Me: What is your
greatest fear?
Jak: Losing my
sister.
Me: What is your
greatest regret?
Jak: *hand tightens on his gun* Next question.
Jak: *hand tightens on his gun* Next question.
Me: You promised
you would help with the interview.
Jak: I let my
family die, ok? I failed to protect them. Is that an interesting enough regret
for your interview?
Me: I’m sorry.
Jak: *settles
back in his chair, frowning*
Me: Um… which
talent would you most like to have?
Jak: I’d be able
to drive.
Me: Have you
ever tried to learn?
Jak: Never had
the chance.
Me: If you could
live anywhere, where would you choose?
Jak: Cridomus,
Fairyland.
Me: That’s your
hometown, isn’t it?
Jak: *nods*
Me: What do you
regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Jak: Failure.
Me: What quality
do you admire most in a man?
Jak: Strength.
Me: How about in
a woman?
Jak: Loyalty.
Me: Have you ever been in love?
Jak: No. Though
I may have thought I was.
Me: You thought you were?
Me: You thought you were?
Jak: What
seventeen year old doesn’t?
Me: Who was she?
Jak: *shrugs*
There were a few.
Me: Anyone
special?
Jak: No.
Jak: No.
Me: Is there
anyone special in your life now?
Jak: No.
Jak: No.
Me: Would you
like to get married?
Jak: Are you
proposing?
Me: What?
*laughs* Would you have me?
Jak: No.
Jak: No.
Me: I’m so
flattered. No, I meant, do you plan on ever getting married?
Jak: No.
Me: Why not?
Jak: I have
other responsibilities.
Me: You mean, to
Maurelle? But what about when she gets married?
Jak: I guess
we’ll see.
Me: What trait
do you most deplore in yourself?
Jak: You’re
really not fussy about asking personal questions, are you?
Me: A good
interview probes to the heart of things. So…?
Jak: Any form of
incompetency.
Me: What do you
most deplore in others?
Jak: The same.
And an indisposition to correct it.
Me: What do you
most value in your friends?
Jak: Don’t
really have any.
Me: Um… who are
your heroes?
Jak: *shrugs*
They’re all dead, so what does it matter?
Me: Who were
they?
Jak: Warriors.
Men of courage.
Me: Which living
person do you most admire?
Jak: Maurelle.
She’s remained positive through all this.
Me: What do you
consider the most overrated virtue?
Jak: Charity. In
the end, sacrifice is vain.
Me: Do you
really believe that?
Jak: I’ve seen
it.
Me: On what
occasions do you lie?
Jak: Any that
call for it.
Me: If you could
change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
Jak: I would be
broader, and maybe not so tall.
Me: If you could
choose how you were to die, what would it be?
Jak: Quickly.
Me: What is your
motto?
Jak: “Constant
vigilance.”
Me: Perfect.
Well, I’ll stop tormenting you now. Thanks for the interview.
Jak: *nods and leaves*
Jak: *nods and leaves*
♥/Kat!e
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