Monday, October 10, 2011


They say lightning never strikes twice in the same place, but in my case it did. I guess that’s what happens when you press the big red “Do Not Push” button… twice….
It was my first day in the evil lair and I wasn’t sure what to do. The Evil Overlord had said he would meet me in the lab, explain my duties and orient me, but I’d been there for almost an hour and he still hadn’t shown up.
I began wandering around the laboratory examining instruments of death and destruction – some of which were still in the process of being built. It was really exciting. I had done some work with villains before, but never someone so high-up as The Evil Overlord, and I’d never been in such a high-tech lair. The master I had worked for previously had operated out of his mother’s basement.
While I was wandering, I noticed the “Do Not Push” button. Now, I don’t know what you would do if you saw a big red button reading “Do Not Push”, but I took it as an invitation. I figured only something exciting could happen if I pushed that button. I was right. Rods from the ceiling shot a bolt of lightning at me. One minute, I was standing there casually examining the machinery, the next there was a smell of burning hair and I was smoking like a barbeque pit. My teeth tingled with electricity.
“Well, won’t do that again.” I said to myself. Then I turned around to examine the room again. Behind me there was a ten-foot-tall, monstrous spider. Its black exoskeleton gleamed in the shimmering lights of the lab, and its great mirrored eyes glinted evilly. I backed away, stumbling in my haste. Next thing I knew, I was being struck by lightning again.
“You know, the button says ‘Do Not Push’ for a reason,” said an amused voice, and The Evil Overlord climbed down from a hatch that had opened in the spider’s underbelly.
I was still incapable of speech, gazing at the thing. I knew it must be a robot, but I couldn’t get passed how frightening it looked.
“What is it?” The Evil Overlord asked, then followed my gaze, “Oh, that. Yes, horrible, isn’t it? I plan on wreaking havoc on the general public with it tomorrow. Anyway, sorry I’m late – I got to monologuing with my nemesis, and the time got away from me. Now, I saw from your résumé that you were involved in the Wonderflonium heist a few months ago. You took out the armed guard?”
“Yeah. Um… is it just me, or do I smell like a burned marshmallow?”
“It says ‘Do Not Push’ for a reason,” The Evil Overlord repeated.
“Right. Yes. Well, um, armed guard – I’m good with those. I’ve got this dart gun...”
“Good,” said The Evil Overlord, and I was pleased to note he sounded impressed, “Well, I think I’ve got a spot for you. Head through there and you can get your uniform. The other henchman will tell you what to do. Welcome to the team.”
“Great!” I hurried to go through the door he had indicated, my thoughts buzzing … though that may have just been the ringing in my ears that came from being struck by lightning twice in a row.

Today's Novel Idea Prompted by: "Lightning never strikes twice, but in my case it did." Courtesy of The Teen Writing Conference contest prompt (just so you know, I didn't win the contest, but whatever.)

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